Paul Karabin and General George E. Pickett.

From Behind Enemy Lines . . .Paul Karabin

(Mr. Karabin is a 1st SC Ranger and resides in Amsterdam, NY.)

For all those who do believe in reincarnation this will be a short version of a story that is already familiar to them. But for those who do not, or as I was just an innocent bystander, this can be hard to imagine or even to believe. Nowhere is it engraved in stone that all the secrets of this universe are laid out for us to read as we need information. But for many, as me, it sometimes gets a bit more interesting than one can possibly imagine.

A trip in July 2003 that was supposed to be a historical and fun vacation in the borough of Gettysburg became a life changing experience for me and my family. No longer do I wonder why I love all things Confederate, especially since I was born in Amsterdam, New York and lived above the Mason-Dixon line all my life. Now, I do know the reason and why I have always been the way I am; a little bit more old fashioned in taste and habit than the rest of the two legged creatures I share this world with.

It was a beautiful day on July 30th 2003, when I stepped foot on the soil of the place where so much blood was shed 140 years prior. Actually, I found after a little research that the Quality Inn Motel where we stayed was part of the Confederate line in 1863. We emerged from our five hour drive and made our way to the front desk to register and up the stairs to the hotel room we did go. My wife and daughter were first, while my son and I struggled with our baggage on the stairs. I suddenly felt strange, as if I was having a panic attack and I remember thinking it must have been from all the traffic we encountered and from just driving fatigue. Upon reaching the balcony I turned to my right and saw a small hill and some trees. There are no monuments or signs telling you what that area is and then it hit me. Wham--I said to my son, "It was there, over that hill". He said, "What are you talking about?" I replied, "The battle, the biggest battle was over that darn hill!" My son questioned my sanity with, "How do you know dad? You've never been here before, God, even mom had to read the maps to get here." He was right, I did not know what direction I was facing or even where anything was in Gettysburg, but my insides were telling me that it was there, so I said to him, "It was there, the biggest battle, I CAN SMELL IT!" Then a million thoughts ran through my mind, all those poor men and boys dead, then the emotions kicked in and with a cracking voice and tears welling up. I said, "Let's get going." I had to push myself away from the hand rail, for I did not want to get going. All I really wanted to do was to go back down those stairs and go over to that hill. But I regained my composure and pushed on to the room. My wife remembers asking my son, "What's up with your father, he looks pale?" My son made up some excuse for me and she dropped the matter. We stayed and a had a great time, never actually finding out what was over that hill.We took the bus tour and drove around taking pictures of everything. I bought a lot of music CDs, kepis, flags and they of course, were all Confederate. No blue-belly items were purchased by anyone in the family. The girls even had a picture in period dress taken of them on Steinwehr Avenue, but we (the men) declined, deciding that we didn't look good enough for the part to have it done. The shop keeper asked me if I could grow a beard and come back next year so I'd fit the look of the period. I said, "I'd never tried, but yes, try I will." Basically, I dismissed the entire event as just a weird experience just from the long trip or the awesome experience of just being there. Nothing else happened until July 2004.

Paul Karabin portraying General George E. Pickett as a Civil War reenactor.

We returned again at the end of July in 2004 and stayed at the same hotel and as I walked up those stairs and stepped on that balcony-- nothing happened. Absolutely nothing. OK, I thought that was just a fluke last year. After we unpacked the ladies went down to the pool and the men trotted off the battlefield with new cameras in hand for the afternoon. As we crossed West Confederate Ave., we were in desperate search of this " HighWater Mark". We did not remember being there last year and wanted to spend more time at specific locations and shoot more photos in each. We did finally locate that "clump of trees" and there we were in the exact location where it all came to a sad end for our Southern men in Gettysburg. I was standing next to the monument that marks the spot where Gen. Lewis A. Armistead fell on 3 July 1863, and turned to say something to my son and there it was. The hill with the trees I saw from the balcony--just yards away. I quickly pointed it out and my son said, "How do you know, how do you know Pickett's charge and the battle was there?" I said, "I don't have a clue." And my son said, "Dad, you are starting to scare me." I told him, "You're scared! This is me we are talking about". When we returned to the hotel we told my wife and daughter the story of what happened last year and they were quite skeptical, almost telling me it was time for the folks in the white jackets to show up.

The trip seemed quite normal except I kept getting looked at in many shops and I kept checking to see if I had ice cream on my face or something stuck in the new beard I now sported. Then it got real different in the Quartermaster Shop we entered. This one woman clerk kept staring and I could feel her eyes following me so, I finally went up to the counter to ask her why she was staring, and before I could get a word out, she asked me, "Excuse me sir, but do you re-enact?" I said, "No but I have been thinking about it." She said, "Well you should, you look just like General Pickett". I said, "No I don't look like Steve Lang, he's a looker and I am spit ugly." She said, "No, not him. Come here and look at this picture." She opened a book and my family were all around me by then and other customers also and sure enough I had to bite the bullet and agree. She was right and now my curiosity was up and I wanted to learn more about this man. I wanted to purchase a book down there, but I was urged to refrain and get it from our local Barnes & Noble store back in Amsterdam. I did wait until our return home.

The night before we left Gettysburg to head down to Virginia for a few days, I had, what I thought, was a dream which turned out to be something more of a inquisitive ghost or two actually scratching by back and bruising my arm. I had a feeling of someone grabbing my arm and it was burning so, that in a half sleep, I finally pulled it and rolled over and the burning stopped and I thought all was well. After taking a shower the next evening my wife asked me where I had been the night before and I looked at her as to question her sanity. She said you have scratches on your back and they look like finger marks. I told her about that burning on my arm and raised my arm up for her to inspect and my Lord, there were bruises that looked like fingers on my arm. She backed up and looked at me and said, "Someone was checking you out my dear." I said, "But why me?" And she said, "You look the part too much, you really do. They probably wanted some answers and went after you." I thought, "This is nuts." I have weird experiences in a 140 year old battlefield, get grabbed by ghosts and probably will not be able to step foot in that town again. My God, what's next.

General George E. Pickett in the 1860s.

It was now August and we were back in Amsterdam and I was reading my new book about Major General George E. Pickett. As I finished each chapter I started putting sticky tags on many of the pages and my family asked me why was I doing that. So I picked up the volume and started to read excerpts from the book to them. I got to the third item and my daughter said, "Daddy, why did they put things about you in that book?" I looked at them all and said this was what Pickett was like and did. After reading several different books on the general the list of similarities started to add up. I have documented over thirty so far. From speaking Chinook when I was a wee lad to bad habits of smoking and drinking. It was like looking into a mirror, and nothing I read surprised me. It was as if I were reviewing an old school report card. Now, I needed to find out what this thing was in Gettysburg, so off to the internet I went, to search for anyone else with a similar experience or maybe to find proof that I was really going crazy. It took me a few weeks to research the subject, then one late night--pay dirt!! I found a link to a website owned by a Mr. Jeffrey Keene from Connecticut. His story was that he had been General John B. Gordon, CSA and as I read, I found that the initial WHAM is called a trigger. If you stand in the area physically that you had an extreme emotional occurrence, in your past life usually, just by being there again, will trigger you with the emotional impact, we both had, and sometimes the knowledge of what went on there. Jeff's trigger occurred in the Sunken Road at Sharpsburg, Maryland. Anyone can view his website information by going to the links page on my website of my retail store. Go to www.pickettsgeneralstore.com for more information on him.

This is all I will write for now as many people tell me it needs to be in a book and I do agree, but I share this with you all and with a bit of advice: the next time you see a license plate from above the line, you should wonder if it is a prior defender of the Southern Cause sitting behind the wheel or just another crazy Yankee! I opened up a general store this past spring and decided to name it after the old general in his honour and memory. As previously mentioned you can visit me at www.pickettsgeneralstore.com and email me on the site. May the good Lord shed his kindness on you all for all the days of your lives.